Negativity can take the pleasure out of life, and oftentimes we are our own worst enemy. If you are prone to a negative internal dialogue – one that influences what you say, do, think, feel or behave – and you are struggling to silence it, we have some tips for you that might just help to improve matters.
Understanding that having a positive mental attitude is a choice is the first stage in inculcating a new, happier you. You get to decide whether you want to be positive or negative about something. Of course, years of ingrained thinking, may well have you automatically reaching for a crabby, miserable response to a situation, but what you have to do is stop yourself, and choose to be positive. This takes a great deal of practice and it is certainly isn’t something you’ll achieve overnight. But to start with, just remember that you get to choose how you react to any situation or thought. You are in control.
You will struggle to feel positive in life if you surround yourself with negativity. The chances are, if you have previously been a negative person – someone who moaned and complained all the time, you will have attracted a very similar ilk of friend and acquaintance. Well, now you need to ditch that negativity from your life.
Negative people have a negative energy that will bring you down. They will tend to be judgemental and argumentative, and will not see the good in a situation. They will not want anyone to be happier than they are, even if they say otherwise. This will be incredibly hurtful to your chances of being positive. So distance yourself from these people and make new friends.
If it isn’t possible to change the people you are with – this could be your family or colleagues – then try and change the subject if you find the negativity is wearing you down. Introduce something positive, or skip away and ignore what is being said.
Believe it or not, your body and your mind are connected intrinsically and you can’t do anything with one that won’t affect the other. You can trick your mind into becoming more optimistic and positive by choosing to practice better body language. Shoulders up, head high, back straight, and smile. Keep your body open and welcoming, and your mind will be too!
Regardless of the situation you find yourself in, there will be some good to come out of it. Rather than be run down by bad experiences, search for what it can teach you, or seek out the positives. You may be stuck in traffic for an age, for example, but if this allows you to hear a radio programme or listen to a favourite piece of music, then you can turn this into a good moment. You may have a bad relationship and you feel your heart has been broken, but if you consider that you had some great times, met new people and learned new things, you’ll see there are positives too.
By keeping a journal and logging the things you are grateful for, you will rapidly move away from negativity and disappointment. The smallest things can be included in your notebook: you may have had a really lovely tomato with your lunch, or a sweet conversation with a neighbour, or you saw a rainbow, or heard some beautiful birdsong. It really doesn’t matter what it is, if it made you feel happy in that moment, list it in your gratitude journal and count your blessings. Practicing gratitude in this way can help to shift your perspective so that you are generally more positive and aware of what is going on around you.
Creating a positive environment is tricky because what seems positive for you, may not be for someone else. What’s a given, is that a cluttered, untidy or dirty space will not make you feel good. Funnily enough, sorting out, throwing out, and cleaning, are wonderful ways to help you feel more positive. De-junk your work and living space and give unwanted items to charity. Treat yourself to some new paint, or buy yourself some flowers. Place post-its or motivational posters somewhere you can see them, or simply have a favourite photo close by that makes you feel good.
Sometimes we become so self-absorbed we forget about everyone else. Focusing on the needs of another person is another great way to become more positive yourself. Think about what you can do for others, or even just one other person. You could consider volunteering for a charity, visiting an elderly or infirm neighbour, or walking someone else’s dog. Failing that, try and do one small kind thing per day for a complete stranger: pick up something they’ve dropped, buy them a coffee, or compliment someone on their hair or perfume.
You’re a human being, and like all human beings you have flaws. However, much more than that, you are incredible and you are an individual. There is no-one quite like you. Celebrate this fact and cherish who you are. Life is a party that you can’t attend twice, so live your life to the best of your ability, and enjoy!
Created by Tom Vermeersch
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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Negativity can take the pleasure out of life, and oftentimes we are our own worst enemy. If you are prone to a negative internal dialogue – one that influences what you say, do, think, feel or behave – and you are struggling to silence it, we have some tips for you that might just help to improve matters.
Understanding that having a positive mental attitude is a choice is the first stage in inculcating a new, happier you. You get to decide whether you want to be positive or negative about something. Of course, years of ingrained thinking, may well have you automatically reaching for a crabby, miserable response to a situation, but what you have to do is stop yourself, and choose to be positive. This takes a great deal of practice and it is certainly isn’t something you’ll achieve overnight. But to start with, just remember that you get to choose how you react to any situation or thought. You are in control.
You will struggle to feel positive in life if you surround yourself with negativity. The chances are, if you have previously been a negative person – someone who moaned and complained all the time, you will have attracted a very similar ilk of friend and acquaintance. Well, now you need to ditch that negativity from your life.
Negative people have a negative energy that will bring you down. They will tend to be judgemental and argumentative, and will not see the good in a situation. They will not want anyone to be happier than they are, even if they say otherwise. This will be incredibly hurtful to your chances of being positive. So distance yourself from these people and make new friends.
If it isn’t possible to change the people you are with – this could be your family or colleagues – then try and change the subject if you find the negativity is wearing you down. Introduce something positive, or skip away and ignore what is being said.
Believe it or not, your body and your mind are connected intrinsically and you can’t do anything with one that won’t affect the other. You can trick your mind into becoming more optimistic and positive by choosing to practice better body language. Shoulders up, head high, back straight, and smile. Keep your body open and welcoming, and your mind will be too!
Regardless of the situation you find yourself in, there will be some good to come out of it. Rather than be run down by bad experiences, search for what it can teach you, or seek out the positives. You may be stuck in traffic for an age, for example, but if this allows you to hear a radio programme or listen to a favourite piece of music, then you can turn this into a good moment. You may have a bad relationship and you feel your heart has been broken, but if you consider that you had some great times, met new people and learned new things, you’ll see there are positives too.
By keeping a journal and logging the things you are grateful for, you will rapidly move away from negativity and disappointment. The smallest things can be included in your notebook: you may have had a really lovely tomato with your lunch, or a sweet conversation with a neighbour, or you saw a rainbow, or heard some beautiful birdsong. It really doesn’t matter what it is, if it made you feel happy in that moment, list it in your gratitude journal and count your blessings. Practicing gratitude in this way can help to shift your perspective so that you are generally more positive and aware of what is going on around you.
Creating a positive environment is tricky because what seems positive for you, may not be for someone else. What’s a given, is that a cluttered, untidy or dirty space will not make you feel good. Funnily enough, sorting out, throwing out, and cleaning, are wonderful ways to help you feel more positive. De-junk your work and living space and give unwanted items to charity. Treat yourself to some new paint, or buy yourself some flowers. Place post-its or motivational posters somewhere you can see them, or simply have a favourite photo close by that makes you feel good.
Sometimes we become so self-absorbed we forget about everyone else. Focusing on the needs of another person is another great way to become more positive yourself. Think about what you can do for others, or even just one other person. You could consider volunteering for a charity, visiting an elderly or infirm neighbour, or walking someone else’s dog. Failing that, try and do one small kind thing per day for a complete stranger: pick up something they’ve dropped, buy them a coffee, or compliment someone on their hair or perfume.
You’re a human being, and like all human beings you have flaws. However, much more than that, you are incredible and you are an individual. There is no-one quite like you. Celebrate this fact and cherish who you are. Life is a party that you can’t attend twice, so live your life to the best of your ability, and enjoy!
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Read the complete article
We all want to be successful but many of us find the path to achieving our dreams is blocked by our fear of failure. Whether you’re trying to lose weight, go backpacking around the world or start up a new business, you need to accept that you might fail many times over before you achieve success.
Do you find yourself often thinking about your past? Do you wish you could turn back the clock to days gone by or things as they were before covid disrupted the world?
Do you suffer from a disorder known as "musturbation"? This term was first coined in the 1950s by psychotherapist Albert Ellis and described the way a negative inner voice rules our minds and bludgeons us with words such as "must", "should", and "ought".
Feel like you overthink too much? Having a hard time making decisions? Or feel like you don’t consider your options enough? Find out how to strike a balance.
Some people are overly sensitive to the time change and it can take days, if not weeks, for them to feel right again, while others barely even notice.
Read the complete article
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Do you always feel that everything’s always going wrong? Find out how to stop this cycle of bad thoughts in its tracks. When you think positively, things will start to appear positive and you will eventually feel more positive and optimistic.
As nice as it is for a person to celebrate New Year, it's not so nice for a dog, especially when the loud fireworks go off the whole night. This is really frightening for many dogs. Read our 7 tips on how you can help your dog with his fear of fireworks.
It’s such a positive thing to do and hope springs eternal, so why not commit yourself to a change this year? Here’s our tips on how to stick to your new year’s resolutions.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
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