Bach Flower Advice

Letting go of the past: 5 tips

verleden-loslaten

Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

Typically, we’ll all need a bit of time to process things after a negative experience. But we go on again after a bit of time. Sometimes negative experiences of the past can put on such a weight that it can cause a burden many years later. In such a case, we can speak of “not being able to let go of the past”. Nevertheless, life with nasty things from the past can make a heavy impact; and not only on our mood but also our general wellbeing.

How do you let go of the past?

  1. To be able to let go of the past, you have to know for yourself that there are some memories you’d rather not have. Don’t try to evade these memories. To be able to let go of them, you firstly need to accept them.
     
  2. The seconds step connects with the first step. You have nasty memories that make your life miserable. But these memories are over and are not in the present. In others words, these memories exist, but you can ban the emotions that went with them.
     
  3. Don’t think too quickly that step 2 worked for you. We like to deceive ourselves in thinking we master our emotions. Because of this faulty thinking, resentment of what went on in the past only grows.
     
  4. Don’t be afraid of the truth. It’s a great relief if you can tell the truth about the past. Okay, this may be hurtful; but hiding the truth hurts you. That’s why you have to try and calmly accept the truth without too many emotions.
     
  5. Directly related to step 4, you should know that there should be no artificial sympathy between the person or people you’re having a problem with. Let them know what they’ve done wrong.

So it all comes down to letting people know in an open, honest and preferably calm way what’s bothering you. Only when the past lessons are wiped out from the blackboard can you write a new future.
A handy and healthy tool for letting go of your emotions is the use of Bach flower remedies. These are natural products, which have no side effects at all. Consulting an experienced Bach flower therapist will allow you to get a custom made mix that will deal with all your problems and will allow you to let go of the past.

Created by Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.

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Letting go of the past: 5 tips

Letting go of the past: 5 tips
verleden-loslaten

Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

Typically, we’ll all need a bit of time to process things after a negative experience. But we go on again after a bit of time. Sometimes negative experiences of the past can put on such a weight that it can cause a burden many years later. In such a case, we can speak of “not being able to let go of the past”. Nevertheless, life with nasty things from the past can make a heavy impact; and not only on our mood but also our general wellbeing.

How do you let go of the past?

  1. To be able to let go of the past, you have to know for yourself that there are some memories you’d rather not have. Don’t try to evade these memories. To be able to let go of them, you firstly need to accept them.
     
  2. The seconds step connects with the first step. You have nasty memories that make your life miserable. But these memories are over and are not in the present. In others words, these memories exist, but you can ban the emotions that went with them.
     
  3. Don’t think too quickly that step 2 worked for you. We like to deceive ourselves in thinking we master our emotions. Because of this faulty thinking, resentment of what went on in the past only grows.
     
  4. Don’t be afraid of the truth. It’s a great relief if you can tell the truth about the past. Okay, this may be hurtful; but hiding the truth hurts you. That’s why you have to try and calmly accept the truth without too many emotions.
     
  5. Directly related to step 4, you should know that there should be no artificial sympathy between the person or people you’re having a problem with. Let them know what they’ve done wrong.

So it all comes down to letting people know in an open, honest and preferably calm way what’s bothering you. Only when the past lessons are wiped out from the blackboard can you write a new future.
A handy and healthy tool for letting go of your emotions is the use of Bach flower remedies. These are natural products, which have no side effects at all. Consulting an experienced Bach flower therapist will allow you to get a custom made mix that will deal with all your problems and will allow you to let go of the past.


Marie Pure

Other articles


Even the brightest minds have setbacks!

Even the brightest minds have setbacks!

We all want to be successful but many of us find the path to achieving our dreams is blocked by our fear of failure. Whether you’re trying to lose weight, go backpacking around the world or start up a new business, you need to accept that you might fail many times over before you achieve success.

Read the complete article

Are you stuck in a rut

Are you stuck in a rut?

Sometimes it’s hard to notice when we've become trapped in familiar routines. Take our quiz to find out if you’re stuck in a rut and what you can do about it.

Read the complete article

Top 5 nonsensical reasons to have doubts about yourself

Top 5 nonsensical reasons to have doubts about yourself

It happens to everyone at times: we start doubting ourselves. We worry about the decisions and whether we can face future challenges that life has in store. And sometimes we feel that we just aren't good enough.

Read the complete article

Six things we think will make us happy, but don't!

Six things we think will make us happy, but don't!

When you think about things that will make you happy, what are the images that come to mind? Wealth, beauty, a dream house, long holidays, a top of the range car? Happiness is not a constant and how happy we feel depends on the way we choose to live our lives. 

Read the complete article

Can you accept things you can't change Take our quiz!

Can you accept things you can't change? Take our quiz!

Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!

Read the complete article

Signs you're slipping into a burn-out

Signs you're slipping into a burn-out

Learn how to recognise the signs of stress and avoid slipping into a burnout or a bore-out

Read the complete article

Mistakes as a Parent

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Can we learn from our mistakes and develop a stronger, healthier emotional bondwith our kids? To help you identify your weak spots, we’ve rounded up some of the most common mistakes parents make.

Read the complete article

What makes it so hard to go back to work

What makes it so hard to go back to work?

Millions of people furloughed for months are now being recalled to work. Others, who have been working from home throughout the lockdown, are returning to the office. And some jobs have simply disappeared: many people are facing redundancy and will soon have to cope with job hunting. Going back to work after an unprecedented length of time at home is quite a challenge.

Read the complete article

goede-voornemens

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It’s such a positive thing to do and hope springs eternal, so why not commit yourself to a change this year? Here’s our tips on how to stick to your new year’s resolutions.

Read the complete article

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Going back to school during a pandemic is a new experience for everyone, and it's understandable if children are feeling anxious about it. We take a look at some of the issues and how you can help your child to get ready for returning to the classroom.

Read the complete article

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