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A person who suffers with an inferiority complex can be defined as someone who tends to fixate on their own perceived weaknesses and flaws, while comparing themselves negatively to other people. Of course, we all have flaws but those who have an inferiority complex can see very little about themselves in a positive light. Psychological studies have found that people who think this way about themselves struggle to find lasting happiness.
The opposite of an inferiority complex would be a superiority complex, where a person thinks they are better than everyone else, and can of course be completely deluded. It is far healthier to walk the middle ground between an inferiority and a superiority complex.
Psychologists think that the root causes of an inferiority complex can originate in childhood.
You may recognise the most common symptoms if you’re an inferiority complex sufferer. These can include:
Your knee jerk reaction may be to try not to give a monkey’s about what anyone else thinks. But what you should actually do is the reverse. Start caring only about what YOU think. Judge yourself by your own standards. If you did your best, then you did a great job! This means understanding what you personally (and realistically) find to be valuable, and then measuring yourself against your own standards.
We live in a world where on the one hand we are inundated by images of perfection and glamour through the media and its ridiculous obsession with celebrity, while on the other, social media means we are constantly comparing ourselves and our lives to other people. This is a pointless exercise. When you look at someone else’s profile or photo and feel worthless or jealous, take a moment to think realistically what you know about that person and their lives. You cannot compare your whole life to one thing you see or know about somebody else.
You are you, not somebody else, and the you that you are, is unique.
When you feel better about yourself, you have an increased sense of security and you feel worthy (instead of inferior). Try and treat yourself better, by reminding yourself that you are valuable and by taking good care of yourself (what you eat and drink, what exercise you do, what you read, how you dress, how you groom yourself etc.). Start now by making a list of what you love about yourself and pinning its somewhere you can see it.
Do you let your inner critic run the show? Now is the time to tell it to shut up! Think about the words you use to talk about yourself. Is it negative? Are there elements of self-loathing? Do you see how unkind you are being to yourself? Turn that inner critic around. Talk to yourself about how worthy you are instead. Believe it!
It may be the case that the people you hang around with most are the ones who are quite critical of you. If you do have toxic friends, or members of your family are downright mean, eliminate them from your life as far as possible. Or put them straight. No-one needs to put you down. You’ll develop a much healthier sense of self if you hang around with the people who value you and what you do.
Try and use positive body language even if you feel shy. Where possible, look at someone directly, smile, talk at a normal volume, have the confidence to listen and think before you respond to a question.
If you’re a perfectionist, nothing will ever be good enough, and you’ll feel bad because inferiority and perfectionism tend to go together, united in comparison and judgement. Perfectionism tends to lend itself to procrastination and inaction, meaning you’ll never achieve what you want to achieve, and this starts a vicious cycle of judging yourself and feeling negative about your achievements. You can only get better at things, by failing and learning lessons first.
Recognise that social media is a superficial way to present our lives. We choose what we want others to see. We don’t show pictures of our boils, or our kids’ head lice, or the wet towels all over the untidy bathroom. Research from Glasgow University suggests night-time usage of social media is associated with poor sleep, lower self-esteem and increased anxiety and depression. Social media distorts what we see - so either don’t use it, or take everything you see with a pinch of salt.
What is your definition of failure, and why do you define failure a certain way? Is it because of other people’s expectations? If that’s the case. You may be living your life according to what other people want and expect. Potentially this can damage your happiness. Being brave and living the life you want is one way to rid yourself of an inferiority complex. You are a unique individual, and if you choose to live in a cave and Rescue hedgehogs, why shouldn’t you? Cast aside societal norms if you want to, and live the way you want, as long as you’re not hurting anyone else, no-one has a right to judge.
One of my favourite quotes is this one, from Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Your inferiority complex starts with you, but you have the most amazing and ultimate of powers – you can change yourself.
Created by Tom Vermeersch
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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A person who suffers with an inferiority complex can be defined as someone who tends to fixate on their own perceived weaknesses and flaws, while comparing themselves negatively to other people. Of course, we all have flaws but those who have an inferiority complex can see very little about themselves in a positive light. Psychological studies have found that people who think this way about themselves struggle to find lasting happiness.
The opposite of an inferiority complex would be a superiority complex, where a person thinks they are better than everyone else, and can of course be completely deluded. It is far healthier to walk the middle ground between an inferiority and a superiority complex.
Psychologists think that the root causes of an inferiority complex can originate in childhood.
You may recognise the most common symptoms if you’re an inferiority complex sufferer. These can include:
Your knee jerk reaction may be to try not to give a monkey’s about what anyone else thinks. But what you should actually do is the reverse. Start caring only about what YOU think. Judge yourself by your own standards. If you did your best, then you did a great job! This means understanding what you personally (and realistically) find to be valuable, and then measuring yourself against your own standards.
We live in a world where on the one hand we are inundated by images of perfection and glamour through the media and its ridiculous obsession with celebrity, while on the other, social media means we are constantly comparing ourselves and our lives to other people. This is a pointless exercise. When you look at someone else’s profile or photo and feel worthless or jealous, take a moment to think realistically what you know about that person and their lives. You cannot compare your whole life to one thing you see or know about somebody else.
You are you, not somebody else, and the you that you are, is unique.
When you feel better about yourself, you have an increased sense of security and you feel worthy (instead of inferior). Try and treat yourself better, by reminding yourself that you are valuable and by taking good care of yourself (what you eat and drink, what exercise you do, what you read, how you dress, how you groom yourself etc.). Start now by making a list of what you love about yourself and pinning its somewhere you can see it.
Do you let your inner critic run the show? Now is the time to tell it to shut up! Think about the words you use to talk about yourself. Is it negative? Are there elements of self-loathing? Do you see how unkind you are being to yourself? Turn that inner critic around. Talk to yourself about how worthy you are instead. Believe it!
It may be the case that the people you hang around with most are the ones who are quite critical of you. If you do have toxic friends, or members of your family are downright mean, eliminate them from your life as far as possible. Or put them straight. No-one needs to put you down. You’ll develop a much healthier sense of self if you hang around with the people who value you and what you do.
Try and use positive body language even if you feel shy. Where possible, look at someone directly, smile, talk at a normal volume, have the confidence to listen and think before you respond to a question.
If you’re a perfectionist, nothing will ever be good enough, and you’ll feel bad because inferiority and perfectionism tend to go together, united in comparison and judgement. Perfectionism tends to lend itself to procrastination and inaction, meaning you’ll never achieve what you want to achieve, and this starts a vicious cycle of judging yourself and feeling negative about your achievements. You can only get better at things, by failing and learning lessons first.
Recognise that social media is a superficial way to present our lives. We choose what we want others to see. We don’t show pictures of our boils, or our kids’ head lice, or the wet towels all over the untidy bathroom. Research from Glasgow University suggests night-time usage of social media is associated with poor sleep, lower self-esteem and increased anxiety and depression. Social media distorts what we see - so either don’t use it, or take everything you see with a pinch of salt.
What is your definition of failure, and why do you define failure a certain way? Is it because of other people’s expectations? If that’s the case. You may be living your life according to what other people want and expect. Potentially this can damage your happiness. Being brave and living the life you want is one way to rid yourself of an inferiority complex. You are a unique individual, and if you choose to live in a cave and Rescue hedgehogs, why shouldn’t you? Cast aside societal norms if you want to, and live the way you want, as long as you’re not hurting anyone else, no-one has a right to judge.
One of my favourite quotes is this one, from Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Your inferiority complex starts with you, but you have the most amazing and ultimate of powers – you can change yourself.
Do you find yourself often thinking about your past? Do you wish you could turn back the clock to days gone by or things as they were before covid disrupted the world?
It is not always obvious when someone is experiencing depression. Some people with depression mask their symptoms, hiding their feelings behind a smile to convince others they are happy.
Do you feel you’re always criticising and judging everyone, yourself included? Do you feel bad about it afterwards? You’re certainly not alone! Read on to discover how you can judge less and start to accept things the way they are.
Do you always feel that everything’s always going wrong? Find out how to stop this cycle of bad thoughts in its tracks. When you think positively, things will start to appear positive and you will eventually feel more positive and optimistic.
Feel like everyone takes you for granted? Whether it's working late to prepare a presentation or cooking a special birthday meal for your partner, it's nice to be appreciated when you've made an extra effort. And if it seems as if people don't notice, you might feel as if no one values you.
Read the complete articleBeing happy is something everybody strives for, but unfortunately there are a lot of people who go through life unhappily. A lot of people take life how it is.
Read the complete articleMental health issues such as depression and anxiety affect around 1 in 6 people at some stage of their life. Despite it being such a common problem, many sufferers wait months or even years before seeking help.
Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?
Read the complete articleFacing the loss of a family member or close friend is probably one of the most difficult challenges that life throws at us. When we've lost a partner, parent, brother or sister, we're likely to experience intense grief.
According to figures from the World Health Organisation, more than 260 million people worldwide suffer from depression. And it's not only adults who are diagnosed with this illness. Children as young as three or four years old can experience depression.
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