Standing still while everyone goes forward

Why does it sometimes feel like you're standing still while everyone else is moving forward?

Of course, this isn’t really the truth, but why do we feel like this way and what can we do about it? Here are a few thoughts that will help you to move forward and live the best life you possibly can.

You’re running your own race

It’s a competitive world that we live in; no one would argue with that. But in truth, the race you’re running is against yourself.

It’s as if the person we currently are is competing in a psychic race or tug of war with the person we could potentially be, or who we dream of being. A lack of confidence or self-doubt sometimes creates a barrier that stops us from achieving our goals and becoming the person we want to be.

Self-doubt is a part of being human, and you shouldn’t feel bad about it. A little self-doubt can be positive as it stops you from being too reckless. But too much self-doubt leads you to sell yourself short. When you doubt yourself and your abilities, Bach Flower Mix 44 helps to boost self-confidence and reduces performance anxiety.

Ignore that inner critic who tells you that you’re not good enough and focus on your goal. Surround yourself with positive friends who boost your confidence and try to ignore those who undermine you. Most importantly, break down your goals into small, manageable actions and tick them off as you achieve them.

Be patient

Sometimes, we need to have a little patience. In romantic movies and novels, people find their life partner by falling in love at first sight, but this is certainly not always the case in real life. You might dream of becoming a star by winning a talent show, and of course, this is possible. But it’s much more likely that celebrities at the top of their profession have achieved their stardom only after years of hard work.

You might need to give things time. Work hard and persevere, you’ll achieve your goals in the end.

Make a plan

Maybe you feel your life isn’t progressing as you had expected it to? But do you know exactly what you want?

Have you defined your goals and drawn up a plan for achieving them? Have you broken down your aims into smaller goals that are more easily achievable, and are you working towards making them a reality every day?

Or are you secretly hoping that your dreams will simply drop into your lap without any effort on your part? It takes hard work and bravery to win many of the best things in life. Take action - step up and steer your life the way you want it to go. If you sit around waiting for things to fall into place, you might have a long wait!

Accept that your life might be different

Maybe your life is moving forward, but just not in the same direction as others. Perhaps you’ll be taking a different path.

For example, you may love your job even though it doesn’t pay very well. It allows you a good work-life balance, so you stick at it. You see others forging ahead in their careers and doing much better financially. But high levels of stress often go alongside a high-flying career. You’ve made the right choice for you by choosing a job that suits your personality and circumstances.

The point here is to understand that it’s okay to follow another path. Everyone’s different, and not everyone wants the same things in life. Your turn may come in the end, but it might not be in the way you imagined it.

Things aren’t always what they seem from the outside

If you’re secretly envious of someone else’s seemingly perfect life, remember that everyone has their own challenges to face.

Don't constantly compare your life to what you see others posting on social media. People tend to show only the positive aspects of their lives, so you see pictures of holiday memories, nights out and happy family gatherings. But you’ll never know what else might be going on behind the scenes.

Social media is all-pervasive these days, and many of us are overly attached to our smartphones. If comparing yourself with others is causing you to doubt yourself, try switching off your devices or consider taking a break from social media altogether.

Be happy in the moment

In stressful times, it’s easy to become trapped in a cycle of negative thinking. To boost your concentration and allow you to move forward, Bach Flowers can address the problems often associated with stress, such as self-doubt, anxiety, panic attacks and insomnia.

The reality is that you probably are making progress, but when you compare yourself to others, it can trigger negative thoughts that hamper your path to success.

In the end, it’s all about being mindful and making the most of where you now. Focus on your aims, strive to make them happen, and don't waste time and energy comparing your progress to other people’s.

Believe that your skills and abilities will allow you to move forward. Discover your own path, whatever it may be, and go forward with optimism, strength and courage.

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/prescriptions-life/201803/how-stop-comparing-yourself-others

https://www.verywellmind.com/anxiety-and-self-esteem-1393168 

Other articles

How to beat irrational anxieties

Irrational anxieties can seem overwhelming, affecting every aspect of your life. Learn how to beat your fears and worries and take back control.

What makes it so hard to go back to work?

Millions of people furloughed for months are now being recalled to work. Others, who have been working from home throughout the lockdown, are returning to the office. And some jobs have simply disappeared: many people are facing redundancy and will soon have to cope with job hunting. Going back to work after an unprecedented length of time at home is quite a challenge.

Signs of depression under the radar

It is not always obvious when someone is experiencing depression. Some people with depression mask their symptoms, hiding their feelings behind a smile to convince others they are happy.

What to do when the spark is fading

Why do you feel butterflies at the start of a new romance, and how can you keep the flame burning in a long term relationship as the spark starts to fade?

12 easy ways to get people to like you

Have you ever noticed that some people are instantly likeable? Many people believe that people will only like you because of natural traits you're born with: good looks, talent and sociability. But this is a misconception. Getting people to like you is within your control, and it's all to do with self-belief, knowing yourself and being emotionally intelligent. Here's what to do to be more likeable.

Letting go of the past: 5 tips

Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school?

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school? Here are our hints and tips to help if your child is expressing a refusal to go to school.

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk?

Sexual desire is a complex interaction of hormones, emotions and well-being. When your partner is not as interested in sex as you are, it’s rarely a rejection of you as a person. So it’s essential to be as empathetic as you can regarding your differing libidos.

How to be less judgemental of others (and yourself!)

Do you feel you’re always criticising and judging everyone, yourself included? Do you feel bad about it afterwards? You’re certainly not alone! Read on to discover how you can judge less and start to accept things the way they are.

What makes it so hard to go back to school?

Going back to school during a pandemic is a new experience for everyone, and it's understandable if children are feeling anxious about it. We take a look at some of the issues and how you can help your child to get ready for returning to the classroom.