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What is holding you back?

What is holding you back

For many of us, the pandemic has forced us to put our dreams on hold. We've had to accept that achieving our goals may be delayed for the time being. But do you feel that you're never going to reach your goals? Or that your dreams are never going to come true? Maybe there's something that holds you back and makes you give up before you get anywhere near to achieving your goals.

Many of us get stuck in a rut of thoughts, beliefs and behaviours that stop us from being successful. But it doesn't have to be this way! If you can identify the factors that are holding you back, you can start to change and get closer to achieving your aims in life. Here are some of the things that might be holding you back from succeeding.


1. You worry about what others think

It's common to allow the fear of what other people think to influence what you do. But this is something that you're allowing to happen to prevent you from achieving your goals. You worry that people will judge and criticise you if you go for something, so you give up your dream. Bach Flower Mix 44 can help to boost your self-belief and give your more confidence.

Remember that people judging you aren't important. People who care about you and whose opinion matters to you will support you in your aims. It's your life, and you shouldn't let fear of being judged stand in the way of achieving your plans. So follow your dreams! You'll soon realise that other people are mostly worrying about themselves and their own lives rather than judging you.

2. You worry about things that might not happen

Asking yourself, "What if?" all the time is guaranteed to hold you back! Instead of questioning yourself negatively, try to look at problems from a different perspective and ask yourself whether there's something different you could be doing.

When you constantly doubt yourself and worry about things that might never happen, you're more likely to give up on your dreams and stop trying. So ask yourself different questions, ones that will help you achieve your goals, and you'll get further along your path to success.

3. You don't reflect on mistakes

We all make mistakes but don't let mishaps hold you back. The secret is to reflect on what went wrong and learn from it so that you don't repeat the same mistake over and over again. Reflecting and assessing errors you've made will help you to come back stronger. When you know what doesn't work, keep on trying and find out what does.

4. It's never the right moment

There's never the "perfect" moment, so procrastinating and always waiting for precisely the right time will prevent you from achieving your dreams. Change the way you look at things: you've only got one life, so if you don't do it now, when will you? It's now or never!

One way to avoid procrastinating is to avoid distractions and manage your time better. Set a schedule and stick to it. Taking action and making a start will motivate you and take you nearer to making your dreams come true.

5. You don't have a clear idea of your goals

You will never achieve your dreams if you don't have a clear picture of what you want to achieve. When you know what you want out of life, you'll be able to plan your route to success. Try sharing your dreams with family and friends: their input and advice can help you firm up your plans. If you don't have a clear vision about what you want from life, be as open as possible to new ideas and experiences. You might discover opportunities you didn't know existed.

6. You always stick to what you know

If you're not achieving your goal, it could be because you're stuck in a rut. When your mind is set, and you don't consider different perspectives, you'll find it challenging to get any further in life. Try listening to others and look at things from a different angle: you'll find that being open to new ways of thinking will help you move on and achieve your aims.

7. You feel inadequate compared to others

Comparing yourself to others who are further down the road can be unrealistic and might undermine your self-confidence. You don't know the struggles others may have gone through and the obstacles they’ve had to overcome. And you can be sure that they will have made mistakes along the way. So focus on your own choices and don't be envious or discouraged.

8. You want instant results

If something's worth having, it's worth waiting for. If you're too impatient and give up on your goals as soon as you encounter an obstacle, you're unlikely to fulfil your dreams. Achieving your goals is a big project, and you need to persevere. So if attaining your aims is taking longer than you hoped, remember that it'll be worth it eventually.


Sources:

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/self-help/tips-and-support/raise-low-self-esteem/

https://www.princes-trust.org.uk/help-for-young-people/tools-resources/building-confidence

Created by Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.

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It's natural to compare our own lives with those of others - weighing up the pros and cons of situations helps us make decisions. But there can be a downside when you find you're constantly comparing yourself with others, envying their seemingly perfect lives and wondering why they are luckier, more prosperous, and better looking than you.

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What is holding you back?

What is holding you back?
What is holding you back

For many of us, the pandemic has forced us to put our dreams on hold. We've had to accept that achieving our goals may be delayed for the time being. But do you feel that you're never going to reach your goals? Or that your dreams are never going to come true? Maybe there's something that holds you back and makes you give up before you get anywhere near to achieving your goals.

Many of us get stuck in a rut of thoughts, beliefs and behaviours that stop us from being successful. But it doesn't have to be this way! If you can identify the factors that are holding you back, you can start to change and get closer to achieving your aims in life. Here are some of the things that might be holding you back from succeeding.

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  • Based on your symptoms and character
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Discover how Personal Bach flowers remedy - Wizard can help you

1. You worry about what others think

It's common to allow the fear of what other people think to influence what you do. But this is something that you're allowing to happen to prevent you from achieving your goals. You worry that people will judge and criticise you if you go for something, so you give up your dream. Bach Flower Mix 44 can help to boost your self-belief and give your more confidence.

Remember that people judging you aren't important. People who care about you and whose opinion matters to you will support you in your aims. It's your life, and you shouldn't let fear of being judged stand in the way of achieving your plans. So follow your dreams! You'll soon realise that other people are mostly worrying about themselves and their own lives rather than judging you.

2. You worry about things that might not happen

Asking yourself, "What if?" all the time is guaranteed to hold you back! Instead of questioning yourself negatively, try to look at problems from a different perspective and ask yourself whether there's something different you could be doing.

When you constantly doubt yourself and worry about things that might never happen, you're more likely to give up on your dreams and stop trying. So ask yourself different questions, ones that will help you achieve your goals, and you'll get further along your path to success.

3. You don't reflect on mistakes

We all make mistakes but don't let mishaps hold you back. The secret is to reflect on what went wrong and learn from it so that you don't repeat the same mistake over and over again. Reflecting and assessing errors you've made will help you to come back stronger. When you know what doesn't work, keep on trying and find out what does.

4. It's never the right moment

There's never the "perfect" moment, so procrastinating and always waiting for precisely the right time will prevent you from achieving your dreams. Change the way you look at things: you've only got one life, so if you don't do it now, when will you? It's now or never!

One way to avoid procrastinating is to avoid distractions and manage your time better. Set a schedule and stick to it. Taking action and making a start will motivate you and take you nearer to making your dreams come true.

5. You don't have a clear idea of your goals

You will never achieve your dreams if you don't have a clear picture of what you want to achieve. When you know what you want out of life, you'll be able to plan your route to success. Try sharing your dreams with family and friends: their input and advice can help you firm up your plans. If you don't have a clear vision about what you want from life, be as open as possible to new ideas and experiences. You might discover opportunities you didn't know existed.

6. You always stick to what you know

If you're not achieving your goal, it could be because you're stuck in a rut. When your mind is set, and you don't consider different perspectives, you'll find it challenging to get any further in life. Try listening to others and look at things from a different angle: you'll find that being open to new ways of thinking will help you move on and achieve your aims.

7. You feel inadequate compared to others

Comparing yourself to others who are further down the road can be unrealistic and might undermine your self-confidence. You don't know the struggles others may have gone through and the obstacles they’ve had to overcome. And you can be sure that they will have made mistakes along the way. So focus on your own choices and don't be envious or discouraged.

8. You want instant results

If something's worth having, it's worth waiting for. If you're too impatient and give up on your goals as soon as you encounter an obstacle, you're unlikely to fulfil your dreams. Achieving your goals is a big project, and you need to persevere. So if attaining your aims is taking longer than you hoped, remember that it'll be worth it eventually.


Sources:

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/self-help/tips-and-support/raise-low-self-esteem/

https://www.princes-trust.org.uk/help-for-young-people/tools-resources/building-confidence


Marie Pure

Other articles


How to spot toxic behaviour

How to spot toxic behaviour

You see the word "toxic" everywhere these days, but what does it really mean? You've almost certainly come across someone who fits the description. Dealing with difficult personalities can be challenging and emotionally exhausting, to say the least.

Read the complete article

Letting go A guide for survivors

Letting go: A guide for survivors

Facing the loss of a family member or close friend is probably one of the most difficult challenges that life throws at us. When we've lost a partner, parent, brother or sister, we're likely to experience intense grief.

Read the complete article

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk?

Sexual desire is a complex interaction of hormones, emotions and well-being. When your partner is not as interested in sex as you are, it’s rarely a rejection of you as a person. So it’s essential to be as empathetic as you can regarding your differing libidos.

Read the complete article

Why not me

Why not me?

It's natural to compare our own lives with those of others - weighing up the pros and cons of situations helps us make decisions. But there can be a downside when you find you're constantly comparing yourself with others, envying their seemingly perfect lives and wondering why they are luckier, more prosperous, and better looking than you.

Read the complete article

Why you're not the best

Why you're not the best

What are your aims in life? Do you plan to be rich, to be a top footballer, to be a good parent, or to become Prime Minister? However efficiently you plan your life, sooner or later you are going to come up against obstacles to achieving your goals.

Read the complete article

Feeling blue

Feeling blue?

Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.

Read the complete article

How to spice up your life

How to spice up your life

Do you feel you're always doing the same things and not getting anywhere? It's common to feel stuck in a rut, treading water and just going through the motions.

Read the complete article

10 Tips to get the best out of every day

10 Tips to get the best out of every day

When we’re stuck in a bit of a rut, the days and nights slip past so quickly that we barely notice them. But life is not a rehearsal!

Read the complete article

I don't want to!

I don't want to!

Motivation can be somewhat elusive - some days, you just can't seem to make yourself do the stuff you don't want to. But putting things off just leads to stress, frustration and a sense of guilt.

Read the complete article

Live Forever the Habits of People Who Live a Long, Healthy Life

Live Forever: the Habits of People Who Live a Long, Healthy Life

Legends of immortality have been told and retold throughout history. From ancient Greek myths to modern movies and novels, the dream of eternal youth has been passed down from generation to generation.

Read the complete article

Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.

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