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Do you sometimes despair about humanity because it seems there are far more bad people than good? Are we primarily selfish individuals, thinking only about our own needs? Or is this cynical belief just because we spend so much time online? The truth is more complicated!
Anyone who spends most of their days online in chatrooms and forums is more likely to feel that humanity is going to hell in a handbasket. People can be so hateful to one another under the cover of anonymity the internet provides. But those who actually get out there and do real-life stuff are more likely to believe that most people are good and do their best.
One reason for this is the “echo chamber” effect. Search engines learn our likes and dislikes and the things we click on, so the first things we see when we switch on our screens are things that interest us. And so you get individuals finding their “their people” online. So far, so good, but problems can soon arise.
Posters sitting safely behind the anonymity of their keyboards can target individuals and egg one another on to write more and more unpleasant, bullying and outrageous things. Bad behaviour is condoned, a “mob mentality” can snowball, and it can seem as if the whole planet consists of nothing but evil trolls waiting to pile onto their next target.
Social media and the 24-hour news cycle draw our attention to every disastrous event. We feel as if bad stuff is happening in our own backyards, and this leads to a permanent sense of uneasiness. The self-reinforcement of internet “enclaves” and our continuous access to bad news appears to be a toxic combination that can reinforce a belief that there are more bad people than good.
Another reason for believing that more people are bad than good is our inbuilt negativity bias. Thanks to a trick of evolution handed down from our prehistoric ancestors, we pay more attention to negative information than positive. In ancient times, being alert to danger was our key to survival and today, we still tend to dwell on the bad stuff rather than the good.
Our negativity bias causes us to dwell on a bad event or comment even when a much greater proportion of positive events has occurred. For example, suppose you’ve spent the day with friends and had a fantastic time, but during the day, someone made a comment that upset you. That’s what you’re likely to remember the day for and categorise it as bad, rather than the generally positive experience.
We must remember that things are rarely as bad as we think they are. We need to understand that our brains naturally incline towards noticing, processing, and remembering the bad stuff, but this is an overreaction. So we have to find ways to balance our negative bias with positivity. If you feel overwhelmed with negative thoughts, Bach Flower Mix 65 can help to drive away the dark clouds and balance your emotions.
Some other ways to counterbalance our negative bias include:
No one is all good or all bad. It’s more complicated than that: good people can do bad things, and bad people have some goodness in them. You have to take responsibility for your feelings and the way you respond to events. Remember that you can control how much you let bad stuff affect you. Learn to accentuate the positive and appreciate the good things around you. The more you can train your mind to override your inbuilt negativity, the happier your life will be.
Sources:
https://www.psycom.net/negativity-bias
https://markmanson.net/newsletters/mindfck-monday-66?vgo_ee=TsaYq4oqXc1qfn78I2c6ZWQOP8ZXmRzMvz3Yw%2BcA7gI%3D
Created by Tom Vermeersch
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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Do you sometimes despair about humanity because it seems there are far more bad people than good? Are we primarily selfish individuals, thinking only about our own needs? Or is this cynical belief just because we spend so much time online? The truth is more complicated!
Anyone who spends most of their days online in chatrooms and forums is more likely to feel that humanity is going to hell in a handbasket. People can be so hateful to one another under the cover of anonymity the internet provides. But those who actually get out there and do real-life stuff are more likely to believe that most people are good and do their best.
One reason for this is the “echo chamber” effect. Search engines learn our likes and dislikes and the things we click on, so the first things we see when we switch on our screens are things that interest us. And so you get individuals finding their “their people” online. So far, so good, but problems can soon arise.
Posters sitting safely behind the anonymity of their keyboards can target individuals and egg one another on to write more and more unpleasant, bullying and outrageous things. Bad behaviour is condoned, a “mob mentality” can snowball, and it can seem as if the whole planet consists of nothing but evil trolls waiting to pile onto their next target.
Social media and the 24-hour news cycle draw our attention to every disastrous event. We feel as if bad stuff is happening in our own backyards, and this leads to a permanent sense of uneasiness. The self-reinforcement of internet “enclaves” and our continuous access to bad news appears to be a toxic combination that can reinforce a belief that there are more bad people than good.
Another reason for believing that more people are bad than good is our inbuilt negativity bias. Thanks to a trick of evolution handed down from our prehistoric ancestors, we pay more attention to negative information than positive. In ancient times, being alert to danger was our key to survival and today, we still tend to dwell on the bad stuff rather than the good.
Our negativity bias causes us to dwell on a bad event or comment even when a much greater proportion of positive events has occurred. For example, suppose you’ve spent the day with friends and had a fantastic time, but during the day, someone made a comment that upset you. That’s what you’re likely to remember the day for and categorise it as bad, rather than the generally positive experience.
We must remember that things are rarely as bad as we think they are. We need to understand that our brains naturally incline towards noticing, processing, and remembering the bad stuff, but this is an overreaction. So we have to find ways to balance our negative bias with positivity. If you feel overwhelmed with negative thoughts, Bach Flower Mix 65 can help to drive away the dark clouds and balance your emotions.
Some other ways to counterbalance our negative bias include:
No one is all good or all bad. It’s more complicated than that: good people can do bad things, and bad people have some goodness in them. You have to take responsibility for your feelings and the way you respond to events. Remember that you can control how much you let bad stuff affect you. Learn to accentuate the positive and appreciate the good things around you. The more you can train your mind to override your inbuilt negativity, the happier your life will be.
Sources:
https://www.psycom.net/negativity-bias
https://markmanson.net/newsletters/mindfck-monday-66?vgo_ee=TsaYq4oqXc1qfn78I2c6ZWQOP8ZXmRzMvz3Yw%2BcA7gI%3D
Have you ever noticed that some people are instantly likeable? Many people believe that people will only like you because of natural traits you're born with: good looks, talent and sociability. But this is a misconception. Getting people to like you is within your control, and it's all to do with self-belief, knowing yourself and being emotionally intelligent. Here's what to do to be more likeable.
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Read the complete article
Millions of people furloughed for months are now being recalled to work. Others, who have been working from home throughout the lockdown, are returning to the office. And some jobs have simply disappeared: many people are facing redundancy and will soon have to cope with job hunting. Going back to work after an unprecedented length of time at home is quite a challenge.
Feel like everyone takes you for granted? Whether it's working late to prepare a presentation or cooking a special birthday meal for your partner, it's nice to be appreciated when you've made an extra effort. And if it seems as if people don't notice, you might feel as if no one values you.
Read the complete article
Bad habits waste your energy and time. They disrupt your life, risk your health and stop you from achieving your aims. So why do we do them? And what can we do to break our bad habits?
Feel like you overthink too much? Having a hard time making decisions? Or feel like you don’t consider your options enough? Find out how to strike a balance.
Whether it's with a romantic partner or a housemate, there's no doubt that a relationship with a narcissist can be very challenging. But are there ways to cope better? Or is it better to leave the relationship?
Legends of immortality have been told and retold throughout history. From ancient Greek myths to modern movies and novels, the dream of eternal youth has been passed down from generation to generation.
Read the complete article
What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school? Here are our hints and tips to help if your child is expressing a refusal to go to school.
Motivation can be somewhat elusive - some days, you just can't seem to make yourself do the stuff you don't want to. But putting things off just leads to stress, frustration and a sense of guilt.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
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